British IndyCar star enjoys kickabout with MLS team

Ooh Dan, what lovely flyaway hair you have! And what lovely white teeth you have! Wheldon, who drives in IndyCar (and featured in our inaugural motorsport Power Rankings), was born in Sutton Coldfield; if he still lived in Sutton Coldfield, he wouldn’t have such American hair and teeth, that’s a FACT.

Anyway, we digress. Yesterday, Dan teamed up with MLS outfit FC Dallas for a “scrimmage” (the verb used by IndyCar’s official site), to promote the Bombardier Learjet 550k IndyCar Series race (catchy name guys!), scheduled for June 7 at Texas Motor Speedway.

A scrimmage?! You don’t scrimmage in football – yes, Yanks, it’s called football, get over it.

Wheldon said of his kickabout: “I think that the more people get to see soccer and they can relate to it the more they will see how much fun it is.”

Fun? Fun! Football is not fun, it’s a serious business, filled with pain, heartache and tears. Shut it, Wheldon. Stick to what you’re good at – driving round in circles.